The Artist Way - Week Three
“I merely took the energy it takes to pout and wrote some blues” - Duke Ellington.
Anger is a tricky emotion for me. I usually get upset as soon as I get angry. I am not an angry person, and I don’t want to be. There have been very few times in my life when I have sat in my rage. Sometimes it feels powerful, but more often than not, it’s just exhausting.
I’m willing to practice what Cameron preaches in this chapter. I want to learn to harness my anger and use it as fuel. I want to learn to recognize anger as a marker for what needs to change. All too often, I chalk my anger up as irrational. I decided I need to get used to whatever is bothering me. I need to stop muffling my anger and start using it.
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"Possibility is far more frightening than impossibility.”
Freedom is scary. Knowing you are in complete control of your future is scary. Anyone coming out of university can tell you that. We are 100% in control, though.
With no specific terms, I do believe there to be a higher power at play. Some greater force. Relying on that force - trusting that the universe has your best interest at heart - is what synchronicity is all about.
The affirmations, the prayers, the manifestations, delusional self-confidence, “lucky girl syndrome”, whatever combination of that you subscribe to, they all signal synchronicity. Personally, I enjoy the whimsy of referring to it as serendipity or kismet. Whatever you call it, you must understand that it is happening because the higher power heard what you asked for and is giving it to you. Congratulations. Now figure out how to make the most of it. That’s the hard part. That’s the part I haven’t quite figured out. The possibilities are almost endless, and that’s what’s scary.
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“The act of making art exposes society to itself.”
We live in a time when shame is a very powerful force. Its power is different from the way it held power in our parents and grandparents generation. Their shame extended to “What will the neighbors think?” The tarnishing of a reputation is more widespread these days.
Anyone who grew up on the internet like I did can tell you that being canceled and being cringe are the two worst fates that can befall you. For the most part, one can avoid cancellation by being a generally good person for the greater part of their digital footprint. I’ll refrain from sharing my in-depth thoughts on cancel culture because that is a whole other blog post. What I want to focus on is being cringe.
Being deemed “cringeworthy” on the internet is probably one of the most shameful things that can happen to a creative in any medium. It is essentially calling you, your brand, and your artistic efforts embarrassing. I don’t think cringe is a real thing. I think it’s a new term used to shame people for being themselves. People who are authentic and vulnerable on social media are intimidating to the keyboard warriors who hide in comment sections, throwing out insults like cringe onto what they don’t like or understand.
Julia Cameron wrote The Artist’s Way before social media took over the world, but had she written it later, I’d bet this section on shame would have a lot more to say about the internet. Everyone with an online presence is now a public figure. The fear of being vulnerable in our art has now extended beyond the very specific people in our immediate community to the entirety of the general public. The fear of being shamed is much stronger now, making it all the more important that we work to overcome it.
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Growing is difficult. It is erratic and can feel really strange. I suppose that the key is to let it feel this way. I find that incredibly difficult. I like results and linear momentum. Recently, however, I have been realizing that the higher power we talked about earlier rewards me a lot more when I let go and let it do its job. You can’t micro manage a higher power, Lord knows I have tried. My focus is on growth creatively, mentally, and situationally.
I will do the little things I can do to help move forward. I will take care of myself. Then I will let the universe do the rest.
